I was having a conversation with a little boy about emotions and how to handle them. In our conversation, the word “loneliness” came up, and I asked him what he thought it meant. He was holding a little stress ball at the time, and without taking the tiniest moment to think about it, he immediately threw the ball into an upholstered chair filled with pillows and said, “tossed away where no one can find you and no one is looking.”
Just sit and let that sink in for a minute – a little boy who has such profound depth of thought and has apparently way too much experience in feeling lonely. Oh, and he has several siblings; he’s not an only child.
We often think that loneliness is reserved for nursing homes or senior residences. Sometimes we’re lonely when moving to a new city, or a new job and have yet to find friends. Big changes can make us feel lonely for a while. We also remember loneliness as being rampant during the Covid pandemic when we were all on lockdown. Loneliness is considered temporary and fixable. But when loneliness, not boredom, is so readily expressed in a young child, it demonstrates the principle of cause and effect with chilling clarity.
The political and social climate of fear and attack has caused our children to tread unsuccessfully through a mine field of hate that is blowing up in their faces and into their hearts. They are aware of the posts on social media, even if they’re too young to have accounts, because they hear their older siblings talk or rant about it. They hear the news, and they hear their friends echoing what their parents are saying. Everyone is yelling, “Peace! Peace!”, and in the same sentence they are publicly saying horrific proclamations and dire predictions about those on the other side of their own beliefs and convictions. Strong feelings are running amuck. Everyone has a right to their beliefs and convictions. But show our children how to act like an adult. And if the other person can’t, show some integrity and model it yourself.
Fight for what you believe but be aware of where your bombs are landing. In all of everyone’s self-righteousness, on every side, our precious children with acute hearing and moldable hearts are being “tossed away where no one can find them, and no one is looking.”
Learn from the kids.
Grace Notes 